Month: September 2014

Stirrings of sanity from the inside looking out

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emotional scar tissue / mental health / Uncategorized

TW for child abuse/sexual assault I remember talking to myself a great deal while growing up amidst chaos.  Through memory and journals I was able to piece some of this together, mostly for self validation, but also to give people a look into the active, alert mind of quiet victims. Three year old me: Stop. But I need to get my medicine. Do not go that way. That’s where the angry voices are. Turn around and […]

Can You Stomach Your Future? Flash forward with me

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human experience / Humor / relationships / Uncategorized

 I am dedicating this…well…whatever it is, to  my precious niece and her betrothed on the year anniversary of their impending nuptials: “I love you without knowing how or when, or from where. I love you simply, without problems or pride; I love you in this way because I don’t know any other way of loving but this, in which there is no I or you, so intimate that your hand upon my chest is my […]

I needed his Darkness in exchange for my Light

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emotional health / emotional scar tissue / human experience / relationships

His name was Tommy. He had fair skin and beautiful clear blue eyes. I believed even in high school that I could see right through them down into his soul. He was a loner and very difficult to read. He didn’t communicate much, if at all. He was guarded, maybe afraid that handing out his affections was frivolous or reckless behavior. I felt like he must be somehow damaged.  His heart felt heavy to me. His eyes, too, had betrayed him. There was a […]

The Socratic Method…and shit like that

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cognition / human experience

  In case you hadn’t figured it out already, the Socratic Method got it’s name from a fellow named Socrates, a classical Greek philosopher. I just heard the term when a buddy of mine suggested I might be using that approach when we chat.  Initially I giggled as a narcissistic young lady might when she believes she’s being the subject of a compliment about her high intelligence.  Imagine my chagrin upon realization that it has far less to do with my superior mind and […]

Hi. I’m here to get Lucky.

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emotional health / human experience

IS what I’ll say as I stand patiently at the reception desk.  A well dressed young lady will then give me a strange look…should she laugh or should she cry?  She’ll put down the pen in her hand, as she’s not quite sure what to write down.  I won’t say a word as I am extremely humbled at that moment.  Usually I fill in awkward moments with gibberish-type banter that slowly erodes as the person gets frustrated […]

Seeking Solace in the Madness

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emotional health / emotional scar tissue / human experience

    How in the bloody hell do you do it?    Do what?   Get through days where all you hear about are the media enhanced war stories, suicides, child abuse and neglect atrocities, gun violence on our neighborhood streets, ISIS, Syria beheadings, earthquakes, fires, melting ice caps, Ebola, political deadlock, the 99%…   Oh. That.  Well, I just have to look at my children. I look into my young son’s deep brown eyes that […]