All posts tagged: blogging

Seeking Solace in the Madness

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emotional health / emotional scar tissue / human experience

    How in the bloody hell do you do it?    Do what?   Get through days where all you hear about are the media enhanced war stories, suicides, child abuse and neglect atrocities, gun violence on our neighborhood streets, ISIS, Syria beheadings, earthquakes, fires, melting ice caps, Ebola, political deadlock, the 99%…   Oh. That.  Well, I just have to look at my children. I look into my young son’s deep brown eyes that […]

Are you who you want to be?

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Don’t close your eyes. This is your life: Are you who you want to be? This is your life: Is it everything you dreamed that it would be? When the world was younger and you had everything to lose. Switchfoot It had a hard-hitting beat.  I used to run with it blaring loudly into my earbuds.  It has always been one of those songs that has pushed me to think deeply while charging through my pain even harder than I’d […]

Pulling hair, er…Rank

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human experience / Uncategorized

Staples commercial circa 2009 It says it all really…I’m sorry, it just does. Meanwhile, I sit in a my counseling office doing Gestalt therapy* on myself.  The session goes something like this: Q – Do I wish that a commercial highlighting the idea that summer is over and my four children have to return to brightly lit classrooms with assigned seating and designated computer use didn’t make me giddy with delight? A – Yes. Yes, […]

Painting beauty With the Ashes

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emotional health / emotional scar tissue / human experience / mental health / Uncategorized

Her tattoo read “just be held” in black lowercase typewriter-key font.   It was perhaps one of the most impulsive decisions she’d made for the time commitment it required of her body.  She treated herself to those particular three words on a warm day in July when she felt like she was coming completely undone. Casting Crowns new release,Thrive, had premiered on Pandora.  In a moment of utter despair their song, “Just Be Held” spoke to her.  It cut […]

My daughter/Myself

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emotional health / human experience / mental health / Uncategorized

She looked up at me, tears streaming down both sides of her face.  All I could see were her beautifully lilac-tinted eyes full of water.  It must be the way her tears had accentuated the blueness that she’d been born with, I thought sensibly I don’t remember them being quite that distinctive a shade.  I’m just buying time.  I’m being observant while I think of how to respond to my overwhelmed woman-girl.  Her long wavy hair – both […]

more time…please.

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emotional health / human experience / Uncategorized

    See that?  Even these old rusted out cars aren’t alone.  Wonder where they were headed?   Seems I read about them travelling somewhere in Asia.  An earthquake hit and everyone who was able, evacuated their cars and walked to safety.  No one ever retrieved their cars as the road was no longer useable. Cars all crushed and mangled together.  It’s been many years since.  Vehicles as far as the eye can see. This is prompting me to think way more deeply than […]

I Am…Both/And

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emotional health / human experience / Uncategorized

Now that’s a concept “Both/And”….What the “F” am I talking about?  (I refuse to use the f word in this blog as I am talking, in part, about my dream guy, who just happens to be a Franciscan Priest for Christ’s sake.  That wasn’t a swear word either as I meant it quite literally.  Geez…) In Richard Rohr’s amazing book, Falling Upward, he speaks about “Dualistic Thinking”.  Much as the term “Manage My Now” in my last […]

Fake it Til You Make it. Or Not.

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emotional health / human experience / Uncategorized

Perhaps it’s “backwards day”, like my second grade son gets to participate in at school if the kids behave well enough to earn 100 marbles in a jar.  Maybe it’s a full moon (as I write it is actually!)  Maybe I’m bored.  Or maybe I want to get stuff done and find that my lackadaisical, nonjudgmental, earth-and-creatures-big-and-small-loving self is finding inefficiencies in maintaining a daily practical routine where everything has a place and there’s a […]

~ Please Hear What I’m Not Saying ~

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emotional health / emotional scar tissue / human experience / mental health / Uncategorized

How very appropriate, I’m thinking to myself as I self-soothe with another bite of my (forbidden) bagel with berry cream cheese.  It’s raining…tears.  From Heaven, right?  How cliché.  Do you know how many articles I’ve scanned, Facebook posts I’ve glanced at, Twitter commentary I’ve witnessed, news reports I’ve absorbed in the last 24 hours?  The news about Robin Williams’ “apparent suicide” resonates everywhere.  People relating to his disease, the major depression, that exhausted him completely as well as the drug […]

“Dear Brother (I know you’re comatose, but)…Get Well Super Fast!” the card practically shouted…

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emotional health / human experience / mental health / Uncategorized

Ok, just know going into this that I am both shamelessly venting and possibly overly dramatic.  While moving forward don’t blame me for your sudden bout of indigestion.  I am feeling angry.  And I am resenting the fact that this anger is focused on the almighty power of one of my all time favorite defense mechanisms: Denial. Denial, by it’s most rudimentary definition is a disbelief in the existence or reality of a thing.  A noun.  Like a massive […]